Is anger sad’s bodyguard?

This podcast is based on a quote I heard while attending a pre-session at the Replanted Conference that takes place each October in the Chicago area. The conference focuses on supporting foster and adoptive parents. I attended a pre-session training on trauma by my friends Mike and Kristin Berry of Honestly Adoption Company.  

Mike shared a quote by Liza Palmer that captured me.  Liza wrote, “Angry is just sad’s bodyguard.”

This episode explores the relationship between anger and sadness. It’s a complicated relationship, but I hope you enjoy thinking about this as I have.

Here are some Highlights:

• Anger – the emotion we feel when someone or something important to us is being harmed or needs defending.
• How we may be expressing anger but feeling something totally different
• Sadness – the emotion we feel when someone or something valuable or important to us is lost.
• Discussion of loss when it’s a real loss like death, a loss of something representative, or the loss of something we hoped for.
• Some reasons why we avoid sadness.
  • We react quickly away from sadness – not a state we naturally want to hold
  • We fear sadness will only increase if we focus on it.
  • We feel powerful when expressing anger but vulnerable when experiencing sadness.
  • It’s easier to blame shift with anger.
• What are some suggestions?
  • Realize that unattended sadness doesn’t go away – it grows.
  • Holding sadness is a long-established spiritual practice encouraged by Jesus.
  • Learn to respond to sadness through reflection, memorials, lesson finding, and exposure of what is valuable.
• Parenting thoughts
  • Ask your kids what Liza Palmer’s saying, “Angry is just sad’s bodyguard,” means to them.
  • Explore the difference between push and pull emotions.
  • Talk with them about how we can learn lessons from our sadness.

Closing Thoughts:

Thanks for taking the time to engage with us in this content.  If you’d like to share youth thoughts, questions, or suggestions, email me at chuck@projectaptch.org.

Also, we have updated copies of the “Life Ready Kids” video series available.  This 12-part presentation, along with study guides, helps you face the challenge of raising kids who can live in a world of technology. Learn more by clicking here.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS